Let's start off with one of the very fist memories i can recall. I have two brothers Eric and Brett. One day my mother came to terms with reality when we were very young. She could no longer afford all three of us. So her and her sister and law talked it out and came up with and idea they said we would live with my uncle and my aunt. They didn't say for how long but it ended up to be half a year. Let me tell you it was one of the better times of my life. My aunt and uncle treated us how kids should be treated. I was so thankful to have such people in my life. I still am at nineteen. We had really great times at that house in Flint. They treated us kids as if we where their own and they did a lot of neat things for us. As you know though all really great things do come to and End. My mom decided to take us back with her new boyfriend Larry I suppose they had been saving up their money because they rented a duplex out in Fraser. I remember that ride being one of the longest from Flint to Fraser. How much I would miss the relationship with my very closes'es of kin. When we arrived in Fraser it was more of a better safer community with the police station only being blocks down. Living there for the next eight years with four people, including me dork brothers is what seem to do the most scaring. I had new surroundings and it was all very new to me, especially this skinny biker dude who called him self Scary Larry. He was a new drastic drop to the man of the house i was previous use too.
I recall one day with Larry right after we moved in, we didn't know much about him just that he was with my mom and staying with us. Larry was watching us while my mother was out with her friends for once in awhile i guess and he was making us food, hot-dogs an macaroni and all the sudden while stirring the noodles he started to convulse and fell back droppings's the macaroni fell all over him as he lie flat on the ground. i was so startled an so were the boys we kept poking him and putting water on him but he wouldn't wake up. I sent the boys to watch cartoons as my young self pondered on what to do an within ten minutes latter my mother arrived back home in shock to see her boyfriend on the ground. She called the ambulance immediately and assured me i did alright and should have dialed 911 but its okay because i didn't know. After he came to he said sorry to me and the boys. It was one of the scary moments that happened. for the next 7 and a half years from their out he would continue his sever drinking problem and fight with his diabetes. In and out of multiple seizures. He wasn't one to take care of himself or others. He was a sad frighting individual. From there and on he would become verbal abusive and short tempered and argue with my mother on and off weekly. It really caused a strain in things and activity's. That Fraser house was very congested and one of my not better memories. When i would come to be in eighth grade we moved to a real house with all five of us. IT was very exciting time and a lot better with age but this is a story for next time :]
Thursday, July 7, 2011
Sunday, June 19, 2011
Dreaming: 6/19/11
When i'm asleep my mind tends to turn into a mass universe of the unknown. Anything strangely odd can occur. I've always been a frequent dreamer throughout most of my life. I just wish i would have recorded most of it.. I'm going to start with today's dream.
My girlfriend had came back into the bed this morning after a long agonizing day of ignoring one another. I immediately woke up, in a dazed sleepy notion. I asked her a question as she smirked and giggled at me. "Were we just talking about Dark matter?" "um no" she reply's. "I could have sworn i had a whole conversation with you on the subject matter. You had said Dark matter is something there but not there but it consist of space but doesn't." Which definitely is not what dark matter is. It occurs in space near stars and galaxy's and such it cant be detected by light. its rather quite confusing and i have no idea why my mind conjured that one up.
After falling back asleep and falling out of it with my loved one again, due to another disagreement. I had found my self in deep rem. Completely vulnerable to any type of thoughts. D'Anne, my girlfriend, was a usual occurrence in dreams , so this was no mind bootlegging experience. I play the game Halo Reach a lot so i wasn't quite surprised to have the setting of this bizarre dream there. I was chasing for my loved one looking for here near around multiple rocks, it was becoming an annoyance but i would do anything for the girl. So i kept searching, Where i was, was a bit shaky, meaning the ground beneath my feet didn't feel quite sturdy. After strenuous looking i had found D'Anne, and of all things to be with another girl here name was Sophie. The image of her face had burned my mind, she was the girl i had seen just days before, 6/16 . I saw here at the hospital and i never met nor talked to this teenager, she was in the waiting room with my girlfriends mom, Cheryl and I. I seemed to have quite a bit of staring problem that day. i wasn't sure but i had suspected her of slight down syndrome, because of the way her lip slightly hung, and also how she was looking after her baby sister. She was tending to her in a not so comforting way with all the baby shaking and constant fast motion. Its not right for new born's.
Yes. i had found her with D'Anne i had felt so deceived and heart broken, i didn't know what to think of it. D'Anne had assured me that she loved Sophie, that she had also loved me deeply to and she wanted to try and make this work with all of is. Like the dopey fool i was i agreed to try. After a week or two , things seemed to grow sour, i would see that hung lip kissing on my girlfriend and i would come to be so envious and full of rage it was merely exhausting to contain myself. I couldn't have it anymore, so as the setting changed like one would suspect. The whole scene seemed to shift to my mothers sister, Aunt Shellie's house and me and D'Anne are in her daughter's back room. While Sophie is on the couch in the living room an my friends, well ex kind of current for the moment friends are next door in my Aunts son room. When my eyes came across the room I had seen Sarah, Jill, and Krista. Now was my turn with my girlfriend D'Anne so as we lye in bed with one another, i expressed my thought's on Sophie how i could phantom sharing my baby-girl with anyone in the world but me, i know its seems maybe slightly selfish, but it should, our love grows so deep.
While expressing myself to her she didn't seem to get it at first, so i went out in the kitchen, sure to avoid the living room so i wouldn't have to endure Sophies face. I ran into Cheryl out there, expressing my concerns to her as she was setting up the kitchen she just newly moved into at my Aunt's old place. She wasn't much help, just an ear like usual, so i devised another plan to try and talk to my beloved. I went back in the room and pleaded and begged for her to understand how i feel to try and put her foot in my shoe. Noticing how greatly afflicted I've become, my Baby looked deeply into my heart to connect with her own, and just her own from that day on.
Strange thing was, when I awoke I seen her walking by right after that little rant. It just made me love her that much more even though were currently in a disagreement. I'm full of love and will always have plenty to give to her.
Muahh D'Anne <3
My girlfriend had came back into the bed this morning after a long agonizing day of ignoring one another. I immediately woke up, in a dazed sleepy notion. I asked her a question as she smirked and giggled at me. "Were we just talking about Dark matter?" "um no" she reply's. "I could have sworn i had a whole conversation with you on the subject matter. You had said Dark matter is something there but not there but it consist of space but doesn't." Which definitely is not what dark matter is. It occurs in space near stars and galaxy's and such it cant be detected by light. its rather quite confusing and i have no idea why my mind conjured that one up.
After falling back asleep and falling out of it with my loved one again, due to another disagreement. I had found my self in deep rem. Completely vulnerable to any type of thoughts. D'Anne, my girlfriend, was a usual occurrence in dreams , so this was no mind bootlegging experience. I play the game Halo Reach a lot so i wasn't quite surprised to have the setting of this bizarre dream there. I was chasing for my loved one looking for here near around multiple rocks, it was becoming an annoyance but i would do anything for the girl. So i kept searching, Where i was, was a bit shaky, meaning the ground beneath my feet didn't feel quite sturdy. After strenuous looking i had found D'Anne, and of all things to be with another girl here name was Sophie. The image of her face had burned my mind, she was the girl i had seen just days before, 6/16 . I saw here at the hospital and i never met nor talked to this teenager, she was in the waiting room with my girlfriends mom, Cheryl and I. I seemed to have quite a bit of staring problem that day. i wasn't sure but i had suspected her of slight down syndrome, because of the way her lip slightly hung, and also how she was looking after her baby sister. She was tending to her in a not so comforting way with all the baby shaking and constant fast motion. Its not right for new born's.
Yes. i had found her with D'Anne i had felt so deceived and heart broken, i didn't know what to think of it. D'Anne had assured me that she loved Sophie, that she had also loved me deeply to and she wanted to try and make this work with all of is. Like the dopey fool i was i agreed to try. After a week or two , things seemed to grow sour, i would see that hung lip kissing on my girlfriend and i would come to be so envious and full of rage it was merely exhausting to contain myself. I couldn't have it anymore, so as the setting changed like one would suspect. The whole scene seemed to shift to my mothers sister, Aunt Shellie's house and me and D'Anne are in her daughter's back room. While Sophie is on the couch in the living room an my friends, well ex kind of current for the moment friends are next door in my Aunts son room. When my eyes came across the room I had seen Sarah, Jill, and Krista. Now was my turn with my girlfriend D'Anne so as we lye in bed with one another, i expressed my thought's on Sophie how i could phantom sharing my baby-girl with anyone in the world but me, i know its seems maybe slightly selfish, but it should, our love grows so deep.
While expressing myself to her she didn't seem to get it at first, so i went out in the kitchen, sure to avoid the living room so i wouldn't have to endure Sophies face. I ran into Cheryl out there, expressing my concerns to her as she was setting up the kitchen she just newly moved into at my Aunt's old place. She wasn't much help, just an ear like usual, so i devised another plan to try and talk to my beloved. I went back in the room and pleaded and begged for her to understand how i feel to try and put her foot in my shoe. Noticing how greatly afflicted I've become, my Baby looked deeply into my heart to connect with her own, and just her own from that day on.
Strange thing was, when I awoke I seen her walking by right after that little rant. It just made me love her that much more even though were currently in a disagreement. I'm full of love and will always have plenty to give to her.
Muahh D'Anne <3
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